​How to Cultivate Good Sleep Habits in Children

Frequent night wakings and bedtime struggles are very common in young children. Here are ways you can help your child develop good sleep habits.

Night awakenings in infants and young children is one of the most common problems that parents face.

• Firstly, identify the possible underlying factor(s) that is affecting your baby’s sleep. Some of these may include:
• Sleep associations (learned conditions that the child relies on to fall asleep)
• Most common cause of frequent night awakenings in infants
• Inappropriate sleep scheduling
• Hunger
• Underlying medical conditions or sleep disorders that cause sleep disruptions

In order to help your child sleep better, you can equip your child with the skills to sleep independently.

Strategies for managing frequent night awakenings:

1) Establish a consistent and age-appropriate sleep schedule

• Ensure sufficient daytime naps, especially for infants
• Daytime naps also shouldn’t occur too late in the day, preferably before 3.30 to 4pm, as it may otherwise affect nighttime sleep
• Set a relatively consistent bedtime and wake up time (on both school and non-school days)

2) Establish a consistent and soothing bedtime routine

• Includes 3 to 5 relaxing activities (e.g. taking a bath, drinking milk, reading a story) that start furthest away from the bedroom and gradually move towards the bedroom
• Should comprise of the same activities in the same order daily
• Activities should be relaxing and not over-stimulating. Screen time should be avoided
• Limit to 20 to 30 minutes
• Consider using this time to build connection with your child – e.g. reading a bedtime story together, giving a special bedtime hug, singing a familiar lullaby
• You can create a visual bedtime routine chart (for the pre-schoolers)

3) Provide a comfortable and conducive sleep environment

• Provide a quiet and dark room for sleep, may include white noise or a small night light
• The use of a transitional object e.g. a teddy bear, special blanket, or some other favourite toy may bring comfort to the child, especially if he or she is anxious

4) Equip your child with the skills for independent sleep

• For infants, put your baby to bed drowsy but still awake
• Teach your child to sleep independently. Methods include:o   Unmodified extinction - Place your child awake in bed at a designated bedtime and leave the room until a specified wake time
• Graduated extinction – Place your child awake in bed but check in on him or her at gradually lengthening intervals (may work better for infants as compared to older children)
• Gradual fading – Gradually reduce your presence and intervention over time. For toddlers and preschoolers, you may consider the ‘Gentle Exit’ method, in which you can give an excuse to leave the room and return at gradually lengthening intervals, adding in praise if your child manages to stay in bed!
• There is no best method. Choose the method that best suits yours and your child’s temperament. Whatever method you choose, consistency is crucial for success.

Bedtime struggles and resistance are very common amongst toddlers and pre-schoolers, so if you find yourself struggling to get your child to go to bed, you are definitely not alone! However, if this problem is not addressed, it may linger and persist.

In many children, one of the most common contributing factors for bedtime struggles in young children are the lack of clear parental boundaries on sleep.

Strategies for managing bedtime struggles in young children:

1) Address any underlying contributing factors that may result in difficulty sleeping at night, including:

• Inappropriate sleep schedule (including daytime naps that may be insufficient or too much, irregular bedtimes)
• Poor sleep hygiene (screen time before bed, bedtime routine that is too active, sleep environment that may not be conducive for optimal sleep)
• Separation anxiety
• Nighttime fears
• Underlying medical conditions or sleep disorders that may disrupt sleep
• Significant life changes or transitions

2) Establish healthy sleep habits (see previous section)

3) Establish firm (yet flexible) and consistent boundaries around sleep

• Set clear expectations on bedtime and sleep (e.g. staying in bed, following the bedtime routine)
• If your child comes out of the bedroom to look for you, calmly walk them back to their room and their beds. And don’t forget to praise them the next morning if they had managed to fall asleep on their own!
• “Bedtime pass” – Your child may be given a “pass” for a final request (eg. drink water, hug) after bedtime, and once it’s used, your child has to stay in bed. This allows the child to make reasonable requests but with clear limits.
• Reward and sticker charts
• Provide positive reinforcement (including verbal praise), and show your child that you have recognized their progress, no matter how small